Kinetic Overflow

Existence acceptable.  Miss everybody back home.  Impossible to get good tekka maki here, but clear thought processes can be almost as good.

Aztec by Colin Falconer

Excellent--no "eloquent speech" needed!  For about twenty years I have been submerged in the incredible civilization of pre-conquest Mesoamerica, so I went into reading Aztec with a little cynicism and a lot of background. Falconer has done what no other novelist in my experience has achieved-he has brought this intriguing era to life from the multiple perspectives of Europeans and Mesoamericans alike. Most significantly, Falconer presents the marvel and advancement of the Mexica-so much more than bloody spectacle and warfare!

Letter of Love by Virginia Henley

All right, I'll give this a slight break as it was a free Kindle download.  Nah.

Tudor fan fiction, anyone?  Yeah. It was that shallow.

Who complains about free e-books? Well, somebody needs to maintain standards. Actually, I'm disappointed. I've been wanting to try Henley for years--and to be fair, I do plan on reading one of her full-length novels.

But back to this literary root canal. The central plot which I have read a hundred times before made no apologies for being regurgitated claptrap. Nary a shred of originality to be found. Even naming our heroine Burgundy isn't as clever as misplaced. Speaking of which, it's a nod to the sauce, not the area in France, and for me it's arrestingly ugly. Why not call her Malmsey, or Hippocras, or Claret? Even Madeira would have at least been ironic.

And how could any writer get Glorianna so wrong? Her body may have aged but her mind remained ever sharp. It's also not likely she would have been keen on any of her ladies marrying.

All right, I'm long here. You'll get your money's worth and a craving for boeuf bourgignonne.

The Border Lord and the Lady by Bertrice Small

Resign yourself to reading a lot about Bertrice Small and her novels.  I've read most of them, and there are many, and I find I have things to say.

Why do I do this to myself?

This is the fourth book in the Border Chronicles, the fourth I've read in sequence, and the fourth that is the same story told with a different set of historical personalities. Basically, this series ends up being an engaging account of a period of history in the border lands between England and Scotland with some light fiction tossed into the mix.

Now this is not necessarily a bad thing. Me, I'm a history junkie, so I can get into details laid on thick and furious. But this is not a historical romance novel as I suspect fans of the genre might be led to believe. Romance is the ignition of the senses and the chemistry that sparks into life between two people. Here we have likable characters but no real sense of why anyone should care deeply about anyone else.

Unfortunately the author has gone back to drink from the same well she has watered from in many previous books. I don't want to give any spoilers, but regular readers will see the pattern and might even be as aggravated with it as I was.

Well, okay, all of this, and isn't page 10 just a wee bit too soon to be discussing the nuts and bolts of "restoring" virginity to hoodwink a husband?  Ewww...

Under A Velvet Cloak by Piers Anthony

For the money, honey.  

Well, what more is there to say? This book only benefits the author by cashing in on the Incarnations series. 

As the series reached a natural end (a new God--everything else would be anticlimactic) I did a double take when I discovered this Book Eight. I don't know how I got through it--it is NOTHING like the other novels in this series. In fact, I can barely see the thin threads that tie it in at all.

Funerals Aren't Funny, But Sometimes Funny Things Happen at Funerals by JR Rice

I missed the joke.  Was it written in invisible print?

Ever have one of those books that you get done reading and wonder why you shelled out x amount of dollars for it? This is an example and I'm kicking myself. 

Don't get me wrong. I get the whole black humor thing. I love black humor. But this book just isn't funny. It's a cavalcade of anecdotes from funerals that only slightly deviate from any kind of etiquette norm--and then they turn into Three Stooges gags.

I hope the author keeps a low profile about this train wreck, because it's horribly written and more full of awkward phrasing and bad grammar than humor. Was there an editor in the house? And believe it or not, the book solicits new funny funeral stories for a second volume. Bosh! I think not. Save your money and look up funeral stories online instead. I guarantee they'll be more entertaining.

The Memoirs of Helen of Troy by Amanda Elyot

This was a very clever (if not necessarily seamless) weaving of classical myth into a new legend of the infamous Helen. The first person narrative worked for me, because the main thing Helen had going for her was her incomparable beauty. Now, how are you going to capture that in words? 

I'm not sure you can, but the author did something even more intriguing--she put us in Helen's mind. There, we were able to detect that this was no woman of great ethics and wisdom and compassion. How could the reader expect Helen of Troy to reach the level of, for instance, Jane Austen? 

The very way the book was written was an insight into Helen's character. And the character is woefully self-centered? Well of course, she's Helen of Troy. What can we expect?

Quota attained.  Signing off.